PART 2: CHALLENGES FOR MINISTRY (FOR REGULAR CHURCH GOERS, LAY LEADERS AND MINISTERS)
Most regular church goers assume that sharing communal narratives with the youths in the church is the sole responsibility of the ministers and the teachers of youth ministry. However communal narrative by virtue of its nature means the narrative of the congregation at large. It is not the minister's narrative or even youth teacher's narrative that is the source of authority for the youths' narratives, unless the minister is pioneering a youth-dominated church. Every congregation has its own history, tradition, own style of worship, preferred theology, and the social group it tends to attract. To be generous enough to encompass people of different style of worship and social status to share the communal narrative demands a vision and theology wide enough to accommodate different nations coming together to worship before our God (Rev 15:4). It is to enlarge one's imagination to hear voices of different nations singing "The kingdoms of this world are become the kingdoms of our Lord, and of his Christ; and he shall reign for ever and ever" (Rev 11:15). Our narratives constitute God's grand narrative. We participate in God's grand narrative by seeing every aspect of our lives as a journey together with God, and our narratives as enriching God's grand narrative. If God is so generous as to shower us with radical grace and love to an extent that His one and only Son died for our sins before we have restored our relationship with Him (Rom 5:8) and to include us (i.e. people of different age group, of different social status, of different nationality) in His grand narrative, who are we to withhold our communal narratives from being shared with others who are different from us?
Taking cue from Pastor Tan's Heart of God Church, I would suggest creating space for youths to worship in the church. Let them take the lead in worship, give them the centre stage where they can lead the whole congregation to worship once in a while and let them take ownership of shaping their narratives together with the rest of the congregation. It is not only the adults who have message to tell the youths and children, I believe youths and children are also avenues where God is telling us God’s grand narrative.
Saturday, January 15, 2011
Reflection on church and youth in light of “God wants youth” article – Part 1 of 2
BACKGROUND:
Singapore Straits Times newspaper has a religious article "God wants youth" on 27 Nov, section D2-16. The writer Lee Siew Hua summarizes the religious community's involvement in engaging the youth. The Protestant Christians receive the most attention among other religious communities. In a poll by Straits Times directed at young people, 25% respondents claimed to have turned to Protestant Christianity, 11% to Catholicism, 7% to Buddhism, 4%, to Taoism, 2% to Hinduism, and 1% to Islam. However, the attrition rate among the youth Protestants is as high as 50%. City of Harvest Church which started with 20 young adult members and has 33,000 members today was briefly mentioned. Pastor Tan Seow How of the Heart of God Church which has currently 1000 youth and 250 adult members was interviewed for his strategy. His church provides an avenue for the youth to express themselves through multimedia, dance, fashion, worship and coordinating events. On top of that, his church offers group tuition to its young members and ropes in parents who sponsor iPod, Nike vouchers and cheques as a form of achievement award. Other religious community's strategy was featured as well, such as a Buddhist's youth rock band; youth's engagement in Buddhism teaching before dinner and board games together; Muslim teachers' effort to be facilitators, friends and mentors instead of lecturers; and Hinduism's volunteers working with youth.
PART 1: LIVING WITHIN NARRATIVES (FOR CAUSAL READERS, REGULAR CHURCH GOERS, LAY LEADERS AND MINISTERS)
The newspaper article was written in the light of recent youth gang activities. On top of arresting those involved and affiliated street gangs, the public has been awakened to the existence of street gangs which are usually at the fringe of society. Why do youths turn to gangs? Many answers have been offered and one of them is the ease of being recognized and accepted in gang. Straits Times senior writer Lee Siew Hua documents how religion is another viable alternative for youths to locate their identity. Indeed, we all construct our self-identity. Our identity is reinforced in social interaction and affirmed in community espousing our values. We live within our own narratives. Our narratives are constructed stories about ourselves. These stories manifest our values and our relationships. Every one of us has his/her own narratives and in many layers. A community has its communal narratives. A nation has her national narratives too. Communal interaction enriches our narratives, forms the lens interpreting our narratives and our narratives shape how we interact within our community. Individual's narratives and communal narratives share a bi-directional relationship. This underscores the importance of living within community.
While a child depends heavily on relations within her family to construct her self-narrative, an adult has more varied sources and more mature framework to construct multi-layered narratives. Youth is in a transition between childhood and adulthood. As one transits from a familial source for self-narrative to a wider community which often takes place in school setting, the peers whom one interacts with become an important agent in shaping one's self-narrative. If these peers share a narrative that creates space for one's narrative to blend in, it is easier for one to be part of this wider community. If these shared narratives uphold values such as honesty, hard work, respect for self and others, it is likely that one's narrative will be further reinforced with the same values. However, if one's narrative is incongruent with her immediate wider community, it is likely that she will seek another community that creates a space for her self-narrative to blend in and develop further. Lee Siew Hua tells us that religion is another community that provides fertile ground for self-narrative to develop positive values. This is not new to us. The challenge now is whether the religious community is up to the task.
Among all the religious communities featured, I would say Protestant Christian churches provide the most diversified avenues for youth to invest their energy in. What I learned from Pastor Tan is his church has created a space for their youths in their churches to tell their own stories of who they are. These youths feel connected meaningfully in their church and their narratives tell of their importance in the church-based community. Their narratives uphold values such as academic excellence, creativity, artistic expression, and because they are a community, they share communal narratives. These communal narratives reinforce every member's self-narrative. I applaud Pastor Tan's effort to integrate the youths and even to provide a platform for them to shine. He admitted that this is not an easy task as youths generally do not command high income and limited budget is always a reality.
Youths are in a state where they need relationships to affirm who they are, and to provide a context for them to construct their own narratives. This could take place in school, at home, in the church setting, in the movie theatre, in game arcade centre, on Facebook, etc. Anyone who spends time with a youth is part of the youth's narrative. Parents, siblings, relatives, teachers, church ministers, church members, the youth's peers, artistes are all part of the youth's narrative. The more one spends his time with the youth, the more he shapes the youth's narrative. However, the shaping of narrative is bi-directional. The person who invests an interest in the youth will in turn find his narrative directly or indirectly shaped by the youth. Parents who spent lots of time with their children will have enriched their narrative by their children's. Though it is commonly assumed that the parents shoulder a major responsibility in shaping the child's narrative, the exposure and peers' influence the contemporary youths are exposed to are growing at the expense of the parents' influence. The youths nowadays have more alternative sources to choose from to construct their self-narrative. If the church is willing to explore being an alternative for the youths, the congregation must be ready to create space for to share their communal narrative with the youths.
Singapore Straits Times newspaper has a religious article "God wants youth" on 27 Nov, section D2-16. The writer Lee Siew Hua summarizes the religious community's involvement in engaging the youth. The Protestant Christians receive the most attention among other religious communities. In a poll by Straits Times directed at young people, 25% respondents claimed to have turned to Protestant Christianity, 11% to Catholicism, 7% to Buddhism, 4%, to Taoism, 2% to Hinduism, and 1% to Islam. However, the attrition rate among the youth Protestants is as high as 50%. City of Harvest Church which started with 20 young adult members and has 33,000 members today was briefly mentioned. Pastor Tan Seow How of the Heart of God Church which has currently 1000 youth and 250 adult members was interviewed for his strategy. His church provides an avenue for the youth to express themselves through multimedia, dance, fashion, worship and coordinating events. On top of that, his church offers group tuition to its young members and ropes in parents who sponsor iPod, Nike vouchers and cheques as a form of achievement award. Other religious community's strategy was featured as well, such as a Buddhist's youth rock band; youth's engagement in Buddhism teaching before dinner and board games together; Muslim teachers' effort to be facilitators, friends and mentors instead of lecturers; and Hinduism's volunteers working with youth.
PART 1: LIVING WITHIN NARRATIVES (FOR CAUSAL READERS, REGULAR CHURCH GOERS, LAY LEADERS AND MINISTERS)
The newspaper article was written in the light of recent youth gang activities. On top of arresting those involved and affiliated street gangs, the public has been awakened to the existence of street gangs which are usually at the fringe of society. Why do youths turn to gangs? Many answers have been offered and one of them is the ease of being recognized and accepted in gang. Straits Times senior writer Lee Siew Hua documents how religion is another viable alternative for youths to locate their identity. Indeed, we all construct our self-identity. Our identity is reinforced in social interaction and affirmed in community espousing our values. We live within our own narratives. Our narratives are constructed stories about ourselves. These stories manifest our values and our relationships. Every one of us has his/her own narratives and in many layers. A community has its communal narratives. A nation has her national narratives too. Communal interaction enriches our narratives, forms the lens interpreting our narratives and our narratives shape how we interact within our community. Individual's narratives and communal narratives share a bi-directional relationship. This underscores the importance of living within community.
While a child depends heavily on relations within her family to construct her self-narrative, an adult has more varied sources and more mature framework to construct multi-layered narratives. Youth is in a transition between childhood and adulthood. As one transits from a familial source for self-narrative to a wider community which often takes place in school setting, the peers whom one interacts with become an important agent in shaping one's self-narrative. If these peers share a narrative that creates space for one's narrative to blend in, it is easier for one to be part of this wider community. If these shared narratives uphold values such as honesty, hard work, respect for self and others, it is likely that one's narrative will be further reinforced with the same values. However, if one's narrative is incongruent with her immediate wider community, it is likely that she will seek another community that creates a space for her self-narrative to blend in and develop further. Lee Siew Hua tells us that religion is another community that provides fertile ground for self-narrative to develop positive values. This is not new to us. The challenge now is whether the religious community is up to the task.
Among all the religious communities featured, I would say Protestant Christian churches provide the most diversified avenues for youth to invest their energy in. What I learned from Pastor Tan is his church has created a space for their youths in their churches to tell their own stories of who they are. These youths feel connected meaningfully in their church and their narratives tell of their importance in the church-based community. Their narratives uphold values such as academic excellence, creativity, artistic expression, and because they are a community, they share communal narratives. These communal narratives reinforce every member's self-narrative. I applaud Pastor Tan's effort to integrate the youths and even to provide a platform for them to shine. He admitted that this is not an easy task as youths generally do not command high income and limited budget is always a reality.
Youths are in a state where they need relationships to affirm who they are, and to provide a context for them to construct their own narratives. This could take place in school, at home, in the church setting, in the movie theatre, in game arcade centre, on Facebook, etc. Anyone who spends time with a youth is part of the youth's narrative. Parents, siblings, relatives, teachers, church ministers, church members, the youth's peers, artistes are all part of the youth's narrative. The more one spends his time with the youth, the more he shapes the youth's narrative. However, the shaping of narrative is bi-directional. The person who invests an interest in the youth will in turn find his narrative directly or indirectly shaped by the youth. Parents who spent lots of time with their children will have enriched their narrative by their children's. Though it is commonly assumed that the parents shoulder a major responsibility in shaping the child's narrative, the exposure and peers' influence the contemporary youths are exposed to are growing at the expense of the parents' influence. The youths nowadays have more alternative sources to choose from to construct their self-narrative. If the church is willing to explore being an alternative for the youths, the congregation must be ready to create space for to share their communal narrative with the youths.
Friday, January 07, 2011
Guideline for visiting church member who is sick at home
I am attempting to draft a guideline on what to watch out for during home visit to church member who is physically ill. I am writing this because having been trained for parish ministry in a seminary, having visited many patients as a chaplain intern and having received many well-intentioned home visits, I am in a unique place to suggest a guideline. My suggested guideline is not meant to be authoritative, but only as a suggestion on what home visit is all about. I hope we can benefit from giving constructive feedback to each other.
1) AIM
I believe the basic aim of home visit is to provide spiritual care to the afflicted and bereaved. Some people believe providing spiritual care is the domain of ministers only. However, according to Kate Braestrup, a warden chaplain, she is convinced every human being is called to be "the love in the vulnerabilities of human’s fragile existence." In other words, home visit is an attempt by a human being to be the love in the vulnerabilities of human's fragile existence for another human being.
2) DIFFERENT WAYS OF RELATING TO THE PHYSICALLY ILL
I identify four different ways of relating to the physically ill:
2.1) Doctor/patient relation: In this relationship, the medical professional empowers the patient to make decision.
2.2) Priest or pastor/parishioner: The priest listens to the confession of the parishioner and proclaims God's forgiveness. Or the pastor opens the Bible after listening to the parishioner and proclaims God's assurance from the Bible.
2.3) Fully clothed human being with an fully clothed human being (figuratively speaking): Two human beings aware of their social status, of their power relation to each other, and conditioned to behave in ways expected of them.
2.4) Naked human being with another naked human being (figuratively speaking): Two human beings aware of their vulnerabilities and relate to each other as two human beings. They trust each other, are honest with their emotions and empathize with each other.
3) BACK TO GARDEN EDEN
Among the four ways narrated above, I think the most beautiful one is the last one. I would suggest during home visit, one should strive to be fully present as a human being to each other, and inviting God to be in the midst. This picture is like being back in garden Eden where Adam and Eve were relating to each other as full human being and with God in their midst before the Fall.
4) DOs and DON'Ts during home visit
Having outlined the basic principle of an ideal home visit, I would suggest the following DOs and DON'Ts during home visit:
4.1) Do be fully present and minimize all types of distraction. Off your handphone or leave it in silent mode.
4.2.) If you function together as a team, do pray together with your team mate before the visitation so that your heart can be quieted down, and you may be more aware of God's presence.
4.3) Do stay with the visited person's emotions and feelings, while continuing to be sensitive to how God is present in the midst. It is helpful to learn paraphrasing the person's words and to imagine yourself in the person's shoes. Ask the person whether he/she is feeling so and so, rather than assuming. Make intentional effort to invite God into the conversation. It is absurd to talk about food, weather, church admin matter, and other non-related stuff, before ending with a prayer to conclude the visit.
4.4) Do be honest with your own emotions. If you don't know how to help the person, just say it. Don't assume you know everything. If you are feeling sad, be honest about it as well. It is more authentic for you to identify your own emotions, and to be able bring them before God. It is all right to pray "God, we come before you with our ignorance and anxiety" or "God, I don't know how to pray for our dear brother/sister, but I know your love is ever present with us."
4.5) Assuming you have a team mate, do gather feedback on how you can be more present for the other. Home visit is not a check list. It is an invitation to be fully present with another human being who is just as vulnerable as you are, with God in the midst. Your team mate should be mature and one whom you can trust deeply. If you work alone, and are keen to know whether you were present, recall the reaction of the visited person, and if you are diligent enough, write a verbatim on the visit.
4.6) Don't bring too many people than is necessary. The more people there are, the more energy the visited person need to invest in order to concentrate. As all attention will be focused on the visited person, he/she will be exhausted by too many people.
4.7) Don't overstay your visit. When I first started off as a chaplain intern, I thought the longer the stay, the higher quality is the visit. When I examined this assumption, I realized it was due to my lack of security. The longer the stay, the more tired the visited person. I would suggest keeping home visit to an hour time frame.
4.8) Don't plan a home visit if you are not ready. If you are heavily preoccupied with a family quarrel or a squabble with your colleague or boss, or are tight pressed against a deadline, you are more likely to be distracted. Settle what you need to settle first in order to be fully present. If you are emotionally hurt, nurse your wound first. Some visits may open a deeper wound.
Thus ends my list. In the New Testament, Jesus expects his church to feed and to provide water to the hungry and thirsty, welcome strangers, clothe the naked, take care of the sick, and to visit those in prison (Matt 25:35-6). Whatever we did for the least of those among us, we are doing it for Christ (Mt 25:40). I pray and hope that you will be blessed in the same way the visited person is blessed by you through your visit. May God's Spirit sensitize you to God's presence and reunite all of us in Jesus Christ.
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